It Hath Charms

One of the effects of (or perhaps causes of) my nightmares and sleep issues has been extreme restlessness. It's not too hard to imagine that getting 2-3 hours of sleep each night would make it hard to concetrate and focus and be still, or it could be that this is spiritual warfare and demonic activity in my life and that's why I'm having trouble sleeping in the first place. At any rate, the result is I'm restless in body, soul, and mind most of the time. Except when there's music playing. The longer I live with this, the more things get added to the "weird" column, and I almost put this one into that column, until the Holy Spirit brought to mind the passage from I Samuel 16:14-23. It's after God has rejected Saul as king of Israel, and he (God) sends an evil spirit to torment Saul. The passage says that David was brought into Saul's presence and "whenever the eveil spirit from God was upon Saul, David took the lyre and played it with his hand. So Saul was refreshed and was well, and the evil spirit departed from him."

Okay, I gotta clarify a few things here, before I start getting a bunch of phone calls and e-mails. I'm not saying that God has rejected me as he did Saul. Biblically, I don't think that's possible. And, I'm also not saying that whatever is going on with me is an evil spirit that God has "sent" to torment me. The only parallel I'm drawing between Saul and myself right now is the fact that we both were/are tormented by something, and we both found/find comfort in the playing of music.

Here's the thing: throughout all this, I've found such comfort in music, both as it's played and sung. It's given me brief moments of peace and rest for my soul and emotions. One of the most precious (in multiple senses of the word) hours I've had through all this is each Wednesday night going to choir practice at my church. This past Sunday, as I was looking over my lesson for Sunday School one more time, I went up to the sanctuary where the praise team and band were practicing for the worship service, just so I could be near the music. It may not last forever, and right now it doesn't seem to be a permanent "fix" to the situation. When the music stops, the restlessness returns. But those moments while it's playing I am refreshed and well, and the evil really does seem to depart.